Humorous Wedding Roast †Why Would Anyone Want to Marry...

Humorous Wedding Speech – Why Would Anyone Want to Marry this Man? Ladies and gentlemen, if theres anybody here this afternoon whos feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, its probably because you have just got married to Charles Farrer. Looking around this packed room, its surprising just how far some people are prepared to travel for a free lunch. Its very fortunate that Charles was not involved in developing the menu; otherwise you would have been very disappointed to have come all this way for cheese sandwiches washed down with lager. Oh well then, I’d better hurry up. After all, I’m supposed to, in good taste, put the groom down. So, minus the good taste I’ll get on with it.†¦show more content†¦In fact, he starts thinking from the moment he gets up and doesnt stop until he opens his mouth. He has a wonderful skill. Charles can offend anyone on any topic. People know this and steer clear of him at parties. Often, as a sign of respect, they don’t even invite him. Another reason to marry Charles is that he’s very caring – especially about his appearance. Its easy to see from today that Charles, impeccably dressed, has always been an image-conscious sort of guy. You know, he once admitted to me that his favorite forms of entertainment were TV, Playstation and mirrors - in reverse order. He also very caring - when it comes to money. As he has often told me: ‘The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it back in your pocket’. But marriage changes a man and his approach to spending is shifting. Just yesterday, while mulling over a purchase, he blurted out, ‘Well, if you’ve got it why not spend it! I’m not extravagant enough! It’s a lot of money, but hey, you only live once! I’m going to buy this right now! I don’t care how much it costs!’ I was really impressed by this. And dramatically Charles threw the packet of Jaffa cakes in the shopping trolley and marched off. But more likely for Sherie the reason was love. I mean, when they first started seeing each other Charles was a real romantic. He’d take Sherie to all sorts of places†¦ although mainly pubs and bars†¦ with